I don't know what to say.  I'm completely floored by the outpouring of advice and support from my dear friends.  I'm SO GLAD nobody advised either a) shaving/waxing the whole thing bald or b) attempting the  "gucci coochie."  (Although I will have nightmares about "tailfeathers" and the possibility of accidently shaving off essential body parts.  Thank you very much, GraceD and Michelle.)

Danelle and Carol, thanks for the  reminder!!  I do have a stray breast hair (and found another as I was finding it again tonight) which I have, for the record, both plucked and shaved over the years.  I'm going with plucking since shaving too near the nipple might violate Michelle's essential parts rule. 

GOOD POINT, Joe.  If he's critiquing the merchandise on his very first trip to the candy store, he's a very,very bad boy and won't get to go back inside.  EVER.

Phyllis.  IF the situation comes up where he might get "whisker burned" I will be laughing so hard it will totally kill the mood!  Thank you very much!

SAT Word of the Day points go to GraceD for using both "mons" and "hirsute" in the same comment.